Star Invaders Spring 1985 Ghostbusters II Magazine Review

In June 1985, Liberty Communications Inc. released Star Invaders #3 magazine (dated Spring 1985). This issue proclaimed "GHOSTBUSTERS II", a whole four years before there actually would be one! Even better, according to the cover, Eddie Murphy would be joining the team! Could it be true? Read on to find out...

Before I get into this, I would like to send a HUGE THANK YOU to all of the Spook Central VIPs for providing the funds that allowed me to buy this item and review it for all of you. This item was NOT provided by the manufacturer.

Obviously, with hindsight being 20-20, we all know how the story turned out. So, no spoiler alert is needed to know that nearly everything - every... single... damn... thing - proclaimed on the cover is a bold-faced LIE! Not just what actually appeared in Ghostbusters II, which was released in June of 1989, but of what actually appears in this magazine itself.


Let's rundown the claims...

• Collector's Edition - Yeah, maybe 40 years later as a "time capsule" memento.
• Exclusive Photos - Nope. All photos that appear are stock publicity photos licensed from the studios. Some have had other elements added to them, like a ghost behind Ray or sitting on Peter's shoulder. That hardly makes it an "exclusive photo".
• Ghosts From Outer Space - There are aliens in their "Ghostbusters II" fan fiction, but no ghosts.
• The New Film: A Projection! - By "projection" they mean "fan fiction". So, in that regard, that one is true. However, no second film was in the works at the time, so there was no "new film". That's false.
• President Calls in Ghostbusters - Nope. No president appears in their fan fiction.
• Zobies Join Ghosts to Take Over Earth - Assuming "zobies" means "zombies", that's another "nope". There is an article about Romero's Day of the Dead, but it has nothing to do with the "Ghostbusters II" fan fiction.
• Special Ghost Fighting Weapons - There was some military equipment in the fan fiction, but nothing I would classify as "Special Ghost Fighting Weapons".
• Giant Painted Ghostbusters Centerfold, By One of America's Top Artists - The pull-out poster/centerfold is the same image seen on the cover. It was done by UNKNOWN! Yes, he/she is such a "top artist" they didn't sign their work and are not otherwise credited; unless it's one of these four credited contributors: John Nubbin, Allan Asherman, Tom Sciacca, and J. Pierpoint Sykes. Despite being called a "Giant Painted Ghostbusters Centerfold", the only part that is painted is the No-Gremlins logo; the Ghostbusters and Eddie Murphy are photos taken by others. Given that the fan fiction is about aliens, the use of a gremlin in the logo makes no sense. Sorry, but I don't believe that to be an alien. Also, if anyone can identify the artist and the woman with Eddie Murphy, and what movie or event the photo is from, please leave a comment below.
• Eddie Murphy Joins The Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters II - Not only was this NEVER true in real-life, it isn't even true in the fan fiction contained therein. In fact, no mention is ever made of Eddie Murphy in any of the Ghostbusters articles' text. There are lot of photos of him from other films displayed alongside the fan fiction.
• Special Interview with Dune's Hero Kyle Maclachlin - The only true item on the cover, though I'm not sure what makes the interview "special". Also, his last name is actually spelled MacLachlan.

So, this magazine doesn't even start off on the best foot. It gets worse when you look at the table of contents page.


That looks like a lot of content, but most of it is NOT HERE! Here is the TRUE table of contents:

Page 04 - Ghost Busters II-- Eddie Murphy Joins Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters II (by Sebastian Toombs)
Page 18 - Dan Aykroyds-- Ray Stantz
Page 22 - Bill Murray-- Mr. Ghostbuster
Page 26 - Arnold Trades in His Sword for a Ray Gun- And Becomes A Menie! (interview by Tom Sciacca)
Page 31 - Ghostbusters: The Special Effects
Page 39 - Interview Dune's Secret Weapon Kyle MacLachlan (by James Vemiere)
Page 46 - The Unseen Star Trek
Page 56 - Zombie-- Killers on the Loose-- Day of the Dead!
Page 64 - Sexy Women of 'V'

There are color photos from Ghostbusters on the inside covers, on the front and back of the middle page/centerfold/poster, and on the back cover. No other color photos appear.

Since Spook Central is a Ghostbusters site, I will ignore those articles about Arnold (a MEANIE in The Terminator), Kyle, Star Trek, Day of the Dead, and all of those sexy V women (which doesn't even include Jennifer Cooke from the TV series). There are only four Ghostbusters articles, so let's look at them one by one.



Unlike the other three Ghostbusters articles, this one has a credited author: Sebastian Toombs. Unlike the other three Ghostbusters articles, this one is entirely a work of fiction. Even when it starts off trying to tell the truth, it fails. It starts off telling you a little about the success of Ghostbusters, which no one expected to be a hit. It was the brainchild of Dan Aykroyd, was supposed to star him and John Belushi, etc., etc., etc. (cue Yul Brenner)


Sebastian reveals that "originally, plans were made for a Ghostbusters TV show. (Does anyone remember the Saturday morning show Ghostbusters? It starred Bob Denver of Gilligan's Island, and Aykroyd and Columbia actually bought the rights so they could use the name!) The Ghostbusters TV show would have had new cast members, and Columbia actually began casting, but when the grosses for the film didn't drop, but actually began to grow, the film execs knew they had a mega-hit on their hands."

Well, this is the first I've heard of a Ghostbusters TV show being considered. I certainly don't remember anyone talking of such a thing back in 1985. I also don't remember a Ghostbusters TV show starring Bob Denver. There was one in 1975, made by Filmation, starring Larry Storch and Forrest Tucker. I suspect that Sebastian was confusing Bob Denver's 1975 series Far Out Space Nuts for Ghostbusters.

As a lead in for the fan fiction, Sebastian tells us that in lieu of a television series, it was decided to do Ghostbusters II. "Rumors abound about what the new production will be. One rumor is that it will concern Alien Ghosts. Another is that it will be a remake of the classic Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein. We've taken the liberty of doing what could be a good story for the new film. Let's see what you think of it..."

Right there, FINALLY, the truth is told. All of that stuff on the cover is BULLSHIT! The article title proclaiming that "Eddie Murphy Joins Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters II" is BULLSHIT! All of those Eddie Murphy photos that accompany this article is BULLSHIT! What we have is good old fan fiction. The question is whether it is good fan fiction or bad fan fiction. Well, it starts off with "Ghostbusters Headquarters, World Trade Center", so in hindsight, that might be a clue.

It's now 1986 and the Ghostbusters are international heroes, with headquarters in the World Trade Center, funded by the government to create a Ghost-Early Warning System. Citizens of Little Falls, a sleepy town in upstate New York, are being plagued by glowing blue globes. They travel to Ghostbusters headquarters to seek their help. Egon Spengler, and "his assistant Zeddmore", make the trip to Little Falls to assess the situation. When it proves to be too much for them to handle alone, they call in Venkman and Stantz. (Egon is the only one of the four guys to have his first name stated, and Winston's last name doesn't have the extra "E" in the middle.)

Venkman and Stantz enlist the help of the Ghostbusters Rapid Deployment Force, a government-funded "group of highly trained, highly armed para-military parapsychologists, all ready to destroy Ghosts wherever they might be". They board a C-5A Hercules aircraft branded with "the Ghostbusters emblem" to get to Little Falls in an hour. Upon their arrival, the Ghostbusters Rapid Deployment Force, "a hundred neutron-armed people", are attacked by the blue globes and are whisked away to the alien mothership hovering above the town; leaving only the four Ghostbusters to handle the matter.

The Ghostbusters' plan is to have the blue globes attach to themselves, so they, too, can be brought onto the mothership. They will attempt to reason with the head being, and should that not work, they will sacrifice themselves and blow up the ship in order to save the planet. The Ghostbusters have a chat with Myy-Runn (not an accountant), who "well-comes" them aboard its ship. Myy-Runn lays out its plan - and stop me if you've heard this one before - "My people and I have travelled the universe for Eons, searching, searching for a planet to take over. We need bodies, living bodies for our spirits. We are composed of pure spiritual energy. We will destroy your life-forms and create new, superior life on your world."

Zeddmore won't stand for that. He fires off his "neutron wand" full blast, point blank at Myy-Runn, which causes the being to change into a "huge, throbbing brain, with two cartoon-like eyes". Myy-Runn, now mad, uses its powers to create the Universal Monsters to attack the Ghostbusters. They prove to be no threat and, in the end, our three heroes, and their assistant Zeddmore, defeat Myy-Runn. "The blue light turned the night sky momentarily to day. The crisis was over. Venkman turned to the others. 'I hope this all taught you a lesson. Get tough on illegal Aliens.'"

WOW! Just, WOW! The Ghostbusters III scripts seem like Oscar-winners compared to that crap. Hell, even my own Ghostbusters/Men in Black fan fiction was better. What makes Sebastian Toombs' "Ghostbusters II" fan fiction even worse is that THEY CHARGED PEOPLE MONEY FOR IT UNDER THE PRETENSE THAT IT WAS AN EXCLUSIVE LOOK AT A NEW FILM THAT WASN'T EVEN HAPPENING AT THE TIME! Granted, the magazine only cost $2.50 ($2.95 in Canada), but that's in 1985 money. That would be $7.50 today. Apparently, this kind of deception was par for the course for Star Invaders. The next issue, dated Summer 1985, proclaims to inform readers about "Terminator II". Sybil Danning plays a female Terminator who "joins Arnold in 'Revenge of the Terminators'". For the record, the real sequel wouldn't come out for another six years, and it would be another 12 years before there would be a female Terminator.

The last photo in the article - "hands in" - is a flipped version of the exact same photo that appears a few pages earlier. Geez, they couldn't even pay for enough generic photos from the movie to fill the article!


All of that text above is enough to fill out this review, but there are three other Ghostbusters articles, so there's more left to discuss.



Yes, the title adds an "s" to his last name; though, surprisingly, otherwise spells the name correctly. Looking at the table of contents, the title should have been "Dan Aykroyd's Ray Stantz". The reason this article is not credited is because no one on the Star Invaders team wrote it. It is a word-for-word reproduction of the Dan Aykroyd biography (pages 5 to 8 in the "Biographies" PDF) from the film's official press kit written by the Columbia Pictures marketing team.



As with the previous article, this is a word-for-word reproduction of the Bill Murray biography (pages 1 to 4 in the "Biographies" PDF) from the film's official press kit written by the Columbia Pictures marketing team.



As with the previous article, this is a word-for-word reproduction of the "Special Effects Feature" (pages 27 to 30 in the "Biographies" PDF) from the film's official press kit written by the Columbia Pictures marketing team.

I am absolutely flabbergasted with the temerity that Liberty Communications Inc. had with publishing this magazine and selling it to innocent rubes back in 1985. They advertise it as if it has some hot exclusives about a new movie that wasn't even greenlit, much less written or in production, and yet all it contains is fan fiction and word-for-word reproductions of press kit articles that no one on the magazine's production team even wrote! They should have just reproduced the rest of the press kit, so fans would have a tangible copy of that, and give it some value to Ghostbusters fans.

I didn't read the rest of the articles, so maybe there is some value in the Arnold Schwarzenegger interview, the Kyle MacLachlan interview, the article about "unseen" Star Trek (the original "The Cage" pilot wouldn't premiere to the public until a 1986 VHS release), the Day of the Dead article, and the Sexy Women of V article (which just contains black and white stock publicity photos that don't show off any sexiness). There is ZERO value here for Ghostbusters fans, except as a 40-year-old collectible. The Star Invaders series only lasted four issues, of which this is the third. I guess even in 1985, people saw this for the crap that it is.


Even the color photos from Ghostbusters are fairly common. The Terror Dog in Louis' apartment is on the inside front cover, Stay Puft in Columbus Circle is before the centerfold, a flipped version of the three guys shooting their streams inside the ballroom is after the centerfold, the guys crossing streams is on the inside back cover, and a blurry Onionhead (hotel ghost) is on the back cover. All but the last one are horizontal photos that are displayed sidewards due to the vertical nature of the magazine. (They have been rotated in the image displayed above.) The quality of the photos is not the greatest due to the technology at the time.

If want a copy of this magazine, check the usual places that sell old goods. Don't pay more than $20 for it, and only buy it to have as part of your Ghostbusters collection. I have taken the liberty of scanning in all of the Ghostbusters content at 300 dpi, but a PDF is not available at this time. As a holiday gift to all of you, the full centerfold/poster image is below, with the page fold seam removed (as best as I can do). As an extra holiday gift, Spook Central VIPs can download the complete set of raw magazine scans in lossless PNG format.